As I awaited the arrival of my twins, I felt more scared than excited at times. I was overwhelmed at the thought of having a baby, let alone two screaming, crying babies.

I even had moments during my pregnancy when I wondered if we were doing the right thing, if there was a way to turn back time. I just wanted to eat hot dogs and drink margaritas.

I didn't feel prepared or sure that I would do a good job.

The moment I met them, just a day before my birthday and five minutes apart from each other, all those worries melted away.

I became a mother and I stopped caring about putting myself first. I don't mind that I haven't seen the Batman movie yet or that I am way behind on my celebrity gossip Web sites.

I do want to hold onto my sense of self so I don't turn into a person who has nothing else to talk about but her kids. I want to be the me that I've always known, but I am also excited to embrace the new role that I've begun.

Now that my son and daughter are here, healthy and gorgeous, life has fallen into place, and I feel silly for ever worrying about it. I had always wanted children, and now I understand why.

I'm not the first parent to find everything my children do amazing. I feel this sense of pride when I learn they grew another inch and when they finish a full bottle. I know it sounds silly to a lot of people, but it's the way I feel.

I heard a lot of negative comments when I was pregnant about how my new life would be, about everything I would miss. How I'd never have personal time with my husband or go out for drinks again.

"Your life will never be the same," people told me in doomsday tones.

It's true: My life is not the same at all. It's better, it's different, it's nothing like I ever expected.

I had a full life before babies, and yet it feels even more complete now. Luckily, the twins have doting grandparents who are willing to spoil them while Jack and I find time for ourselves.

People also told me I'd miss bed rest once the kids were here.

"Enjoy your sleep now. You'll never sleep again."

I sleep, just differently. I catch some zzz's in between feedings and whenever else I get the chance. But I find myself smiling at my babies at 3 a.m., when I would normally enjoy some REM sleep.

Maybe it's the lack of solid sleep, but I am starting to forget what it was like to be pregnant. I lost the belly and almost the rest of the extra weight in these first three months, and now it escapes me what a contraction felt like or how I couldn't sleep on my back without feeling faint.

Perhaps it was all the complications, the scary trips to the hospital and the 13 weeks of bed rest, but I really hated being pregnant. And yet I'd do it all again if it meant I'd have another Bridget or Wyatt to bring such joy to my life.

Running errands the other day, it hit me that I'm happy for the first time in a very long time. I tried for so long to get pregnant and I feel so blessed that everything worked out in the end.

I can finally say that I'm a mom, and I just hope it doesn't go by as fast as I think it will. Each day is a new experience that is much more fun than sleeping.

Laura Lewis Brown is the mother of newborn twins. Her column appears every other Thursday.